Everything old is new again

Or: Didn't we just do this?

This is the first full week of summer break. I hate summer break. I am a strong proponent for year round school. The first couple of weeks are always tough as we try to find a routine to fall into. Meanwhile I am really happy I don't have to wake up at 6 anymore. Yay! Not a morning person, not at all. But that's not really the this we are doing again.

So Monday DH tells me that he is having an anxious day. OK, it happens. He can't settle into a book or TV. Still, whatever, it happens. Then he decided to call the crisis line at 8:45 pm. They tell him they will have someone out to evaluate him but not until 11 pm. OK. So that time comes and goes. He calls them back, oh wait they won't have anyone until 1 am at the earliest. He told them he would call back in the morning.

Tuesday morning he calls back because he isn't feeling any better. So they come and evaluate him. First they tell him that they have a bed in a crisis house about 25 miles away. That means a nice break for me. But wait! They have one here in town. That means he keeps pressuring me to visit him. I don't want to. I hate hospital visits and things like that. They only way I can manage the hospital is that they have WiFi and I have a laptop. He can watch TV and we really don't have to talk. It's all good. But at the crisis house we sit in a room where anyone can walk in and out and if other people have visitors they are there too. He sits and stares at me, which can I just say for the record how much I hate that? I have to talk to him and entertain him, or he just sits there and stares at me. I don't think I emphasized before exactly how much I hate that. So, I keep having excuses why I can't go visit him a mile away. Because I think if I tell him I just really don't want to that it will hurt him. OK, he gets a break, so I get a break.

On the plus side this little break convinced him that ECT is good and he's going to go back to taking it in August. Good.

Meanwhile he hasn't gotten a go home date from the crisis house. They are a short term facility. No more than 7 days, and 3-5 is their usual. His time will be up Tuesday. If they don't think he should go home then we are looking at another hospital stay. Then we really will be back where we were.

Fun times. Fun. Times.

Monday I am going to go see what is wrong with my left shoulder. That ought to be interesting

Boy, there is a lot of updating to do.

Oh, I haven't written in so very, very long. Mostly because I haven't been in the mood, or I've been exhausted. I've spent the past several weeks just so mind-numbingly exhausted it's all I can do to get through the things that I have to do. 

Life has been hectic. DH has decided to forgo further ECT treatments. They were working, but he took a few months off for a surgery. Now that he's fully healed from that he's decided that going back for the treatments is just "too much work", even though I'm the one who manages all the logistics. Whatever. It kind of irks me because of all the work that we put into getting him these treatments and the fact that we are back to meds that don't work. It's going to cause problems in the future, but I don't know how yet, and I don't know what's going to happen when it does.

That brings us to The Boy. He's going to be 16 this month. I'm not ready to have a 16 year old child. If he ever gets a girlfriend he's now old enough to date. The last month of school is always a problem. It's been a big one this year. He's really not wanted to go to school at all. At this point he's going to fail about 1/2 of his classes. I don't know if he will have enough credits to become a sophomore at the end of the week. This is finals week. He blew 2 off yesterday. It was a nightmare morning trying to get him to school. Instead of going to school he spent 2 hours just wandering around. He didn't go to school. The bitch of it is that he might be fail one of the classes he was passing because he blew off the final yesterday.

It's very frustrating. His anger is nasty. We are kind of looking into maybe putting him into a residential treatment center. We looked at boot camp kind of things, but they don't accept kids with major mental illnesses. The Boy has Bipolar. Major mental illness. it's not a choice I want to make. DH is kind of ineffective, so it's up to me and I am kind of sick of being the adult in the matter.

We are minus one cat. Our big guy died a few weeks back. He had a seizure and died. It was quick and he wasn't in pain. It was under 5 minutes from the time he seized to the time he died. That's the way I want to go. Once second I'm here, the next I'm gone.

That's my life. That's the way it's been lately. I spend more of my time exhausted. Trying to take care of everyone is exhausting. DH is going on a 2 week vacation at the end of the summer. I won't be, but only worrying about The Boy will make my life that much easier.

I have to get back to my real life for a while. I need to help The Boy finish some homework from this school year. It needs to be done by tomorrow afternoon, so we have to hurry and finish it.

The week in review 2/28-3/5

It has been a long week. The kids were supposed to go back to school on Monday. They didn't.
                                                                       This is why.

Snow is a 4 letter word.

It snowed. I don't don't how much snow we got, but I don't think it was as much as they said. But we did get some ice on top of it. The snow pile on the right? That's from all the snow we've gotten. My landlord has shoved most of it into the backyard, but there is that pile. We got more snow during the week, and it is currently 2x that size in width and about half again as tall.

Tuesday came and went, and the boy didn't go to school. Joy. Now, he ended up home 11 days in a row. That's a long time. It's not that I don't love having my son home, because I really do. But, the past 2 months have been long, long, long. I just haven't gotten a break. I was looking forward to Josh going back to school so I could have a break for just a little while, just to breathe.

I freelance write. The website that I use primarily hadn't had a lot of work, but there is a regular customer who comes in. He came in Wednesday. I was going to sit down and spend as many hours writing for him as I could. Except, first thing in the morning we got a phone call. I'm not a great house cleaner. On any given day there is stuff on the floor, my house is cluttered and my dishes probably need washed. Early Wednesday morning, I say early meaning about 8, I had just gotten the boy off to school, the call comes in,a place to evaluate DH for physical therapy is coming in 45-60 minutes. WTF? Seriously? Now DH had made an appointment the day before for them to come, but he later called and canceled it.

So, he tells me they are going to be here, then just turns on the TV and gets comfy in bed. I went ballistic. Telling me someone is going to be here in less than an hour when the house is a mess? There isn't anything that could have made me madder at that point. Luckily he realized that and came out to help me.

Thursday and Friday were their own fun days. The boy was supposed to serve a detention on Thursday, he didn't, so he got suspended. Right now he's getting suspended at least once a week because of that. It's so not a good thing. But, since I didn't know, because I usually get a warning, I sent him to school Friday. He got to school, they turned around and sent him home. The VP sent me a letter telling me she tried to call us and tell us he was suspended, but we were home. I never got a phone call let alone a message. She left it on the very rarely turned on cell phone. This isn't working, so we have a meeting coming up with the school at the end of the month.

Friday I also had to take one of our cats to the vet. He had to get shots, and in 2 weeks he's going to get the unkindest cut of all.

 

 

 

When you give a cat some catnip.

Our cats don't leave the house. they are strictly indoor cats. I had to buy a new cat carrier to take kitteh to the vet. To get them to like it, I got some catnip spray and sprayed the crate all over, and a towel that I stuck in the carrier. Too bad I didn't get pix or movies of the cats when they were being goofy, but they stopped as soon as I pulled out the camera. Only 2 of the felines we are owned by indulged. Our middle kitteh stayed aloof. It was funny to see our big cat in the crate.

I have my towel, do you have yours?

He's a full grown Maine Coon Cat. He's big. But, he really wanted that towel. REALLY wanted it. He actually pulled it out of the crate at one point, with the little kitteh on it.

It's a long recap, but I haven't written enough lately.